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this
is a memory from a photo of someone's wedding. the gloves are white or another
pale colour which always comes out as white. the church is very black. the
gloves are not dramatic. they do not snake seductively up the arms like the
gloves of filmstars in strapless velvet dresses in a pool of silver light.
no. these are short and neat and white in the dark of the church doorway.all
the bridesmaids are wearing them. they make their hands look as if they’ve
been severed at the wrist. the gloves are to disguise the replacement hands
or are perhaps themselves the replacement, for how much nicer they are, kitten
soft and so much tidier than those nasty old hands furious with whorls and
loops that over the years fill with dirt from peeling potatos, that blister
and crack and cut and slap and go veiny and warty and callousy and knobbly.
i can’t remember which aunts or great aunts of which cousins are in the photo,
all i can picture are the gloves holding snowy bouquets or shiny handbags
that snap neatly shut with gold clasps. the handbags always arrive with the
gloves. with their snickety click fasteners that bite down yappety-terrier
hard snap, the women holding their tongues, snap,
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pursing their lips, snap, folding their arms, snap, saying nowt, snap clickety
snap shut. the handbags with their buckety interiors of slippery fabric smelling
of compact powder and mints.soon the great aunts will gather for funerals
with their walking sticks, haughty in their surgical collars, holding their
snap shut handbags in neatly gloved hands, any remaining husbands bow their
heads and follow them into the front room. the great aunts seat themselves
to discuss arrangements. the handbags sit by their feet obedient and silent,
the great aunts eat biscuits and the husbands gather in unobtrusive clumps.
the younger ones are quick to make excuses, they have children and cannot
bear the darkness and the room is very dark. colour is fading fast, the overgrown
roses and deep green privet in the front garden closes in on the window, light
slips into a tangle of undergrowth and net curtain. when it is very dark and
this memory has become something else. the women place their handbags on their
arthritic knees and unfasten the clasps. they take out little packages wrapped
in faded pink or smokey white tissue paper and carefully unwrap them, they
cup the little pairs of hands and tiny tongues in their smoothly gloved hands
like baby birds and while it is dusk and hardly anyone is looking, they let
them fly around the room clapping and singing.
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